Forsaken One

Hey everybody this is Sean, you're listening to More Fully Human, and I'm recording today on a topic that I really love.

And this one is loooong, so I cheated, and I made it a two-parter.

This is the first one, and the one that actually matters,

because with a title like, "Forsaken, hope in hopelessness" there's the chance that you came to this because you're there, right in the middle of the awful,

and you don't need a bunch of cool historical anecdotes, you don't need interesting theological or psychological perspectives

to help deepen an otherwise boring day,

you're feeling that hopelessness, so that's where we're going to jump in.

You see, there's a wonderful tool that's available to you for engaging with hopelessness

it's called a therapist, and no, I'm not joking, if you're really feeling hopeless,

therapists exist because so many of us deal with that same feeling, that same stuckness,

some of us for brief seasons, some of us due to a single event,

and some of us have to go in for "routine maintenance" on a regular basis.

Point is, we all need it at some point.

Please, don't cheat yourself out of the goodness of someone who knows how to help you handle what you're going through.

What I'm about to talk about is not a replacement for that, but an additional tool to keep in the toolbox of self-care.

And, it also happens to be topical, because right now in the Christian tradition it’s “Good Friday”

Now, that name seems a bit anachronistic for the day when the hero of your religion is brutally murdered at the hands of the empire, but Good, in this case, means holy, not pleasant.

And this day commemorates the day when of course, Jesus is executed by the Romans on a cross for being a subversive political figure and for challenging the authority figures in the region.

While he’s being executed he says, “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?”

And that’s the tie-in here, because the tool that I want to introduce you to is

Emotional engagement through the Psalms, and that quote is actually the beginning of a Psalm.

Now, if you come from the Jewish tradition then when you hear, "My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?" you recognize this right away.

This is Psalm 22 and it's part of your emotional heritage.

You may have even used this Psalm recently:

You may have been sitting Sheva with those who have lost a loved one.

You may have been going through a time of hopelessness or angst of some sort,

You may have been betrayed by your community or you may be surrounded by people

Who are antagonizing you or even by enemies who are threatening you.

And in order to deal with any of those circumstances, you went back to the Tehillim, to the Psalms.

For those in the Jewish tradition, and those adopted in, like me, the Tehillim are our emotional education.

These words and songs are a way for us to connect

The emotions and experiences that we have

To a longstanding tradition of approaching God with our emotions.

I just love this about the Jewish tradition

These songs are not the only songs that existed

But these were the ones that were preserved, that were special in some way.

Essentially, at some point these songs were compiled into the book.

When that happens, it's a statement by the editors that these psalms are significant.

This one's good

This one helps us understand what it means to be the people of God.

This song helps us connect emotionally, spiritually, or psychologically to God.

Or to what it means to be human.

Or helps us process something that would otherwise be unbearable.

From the divine perspective the Psalms are God's attempt

To get his people emotionally and psychologically involved in a process

Where they engage with what is going on in their life and particularly, they engage their emotions.

And the patterns in the Psalms help them to do this in a way

that makes them whole, honest, vulnerable, and that makes room for healing and for transformation.

Now, it's not pretty sometimes,

because in this process nothing is off-limits

I mean the songs are full of all kinds of

terrible, even evil, emotions and feelings.

For example, in some psalms there are calls to kill our enemies children and all kinds of violent, vengeful ideations.

But the psalms are not an endorsement claiming that this content is appropriate behavior, or even appropriate thoughts,

Instead, it's an invitation to present your raw, unfiltered, thoughts and feelings before God.

And any psychotherapist worth their salt knows what this can do... honest talk about our feelings changes our feelings.

We actually witness this in most of the Psalms as well: the desire changes over the course of the Psalm.

So you might start out in a place of hopelessness, or vengeance, or anger

And move to a place of peace, or hope, or begin to trust again as you engage in the process of healing.

It's a phenomenal practice - not just the seeing a therapist, but also the engaging with the psalms - and I highly encourage

Anybody who's listening to this to

Take that as something something

To carry into your day.

It's as simple as finding a Psalm that you like, maybe one that seems to fit how you're feeling,

And read it aloud (ideally in private) and let it give words to the feelings and emotions that you're having

Even if you're not sure what you think of God right now, even if it's "bad theology" (and some of them are, by design)

I guarantee you that it's going to be helpful to get those emotions out into words.

And that brings us back to Psalm 22 which is one of the greatest hits written by the most famous

of the Psalmists

It's a song of David.

And David is in case you're unaware a prophet a priest and a king

which is the trifecta of ancient Jewish leadership

One of the things that's interesting about David's Psalms is that, because of his varied roles, there's so many different ways to interpret his Psalms.

The psalm could be one of the songs that he wrote when he was trying to process his own life

because a lot of the Psalms of David are actually

copied out of David's journal and then added to the Tehillim later

so thatwe can use them to identify as a fellow human in process.

I can take the words and relate, dude to ancient dude, just attempting to make sense of life.

But there's also that prophetic aspect, which basically means that David was

recognized to have a very close relationship with God, the kind of relationship where God told him things.

They could be things that were going to happen in the future, mysteries about what God is like, warnings about what not to do, divine impartations of wisdom, et cetera.

So one of the other ways to interpret the Psalms of David

is to try and guess what God is revealing to David and what

God may be showing David about something that's going to happen.

And then also as a king, sometimes David is trying to give his people words

that help them understand who they are as a collective

and to give them a shared identity

All that to say that this psalm can be read as a unifying identity for the people of God,

it can be read as a personal record of David's own experiences,

it can be read as an emotional journey that David feels is important for the people,

and it can also be read as a mystic encounter with a God who reveals secrets.

Personally, I think we should choose "all of the above"

because do you really want to miss out on any of the good stuff by narrowing your perspective?

I think it's important to keep our options open especially when we regard the theme of Psalm 22: hope in hopelessness

As you can probably tell from that first line,

My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?

Psalm 22 is a song for those who are in deep despair

And especially those facing Injustice

As as you will see as we read it there's just so much in this song

about a good or even a righteous person who is

being made to experience deep deep suffering and to be antagonized by

Those who do not love them and who are not good, not righteous.

It's what happens when the bad guys beat the good guys

But it's not all bad news, there's also hope in it

And that's what we're going through all of this to get to.

So, here it is,

Psalm 22

It begins with some musical notation

For the choir director

According to the doe of the morning (which is probably a reference for the melody)

A Psalm of David

And now it begins

My God my God why have you forsaken me

Far from my Deliverance are the words of my groaning

Oh my God I Cry by day but you do not answer

and by night but there is no silence for me

Yet

You Are Holy

You who inhabits the Praises of Israel

In you our father's trusted they trusted and you rescued them

To you they cried out and they fled to safety

In you they trusted and they were not disappointed

But I am a worm and not a human.

I am a disgrace of mankind and despised by the people

All who see me mock me

They sneer, they shake their head saying,

Commit yourself to the Lord, let the Lord save you;

Let the Lord rescue you because he Delights in you.

So, pause, if you're tracking, our hero is disgraced

and the people are mocking him and taunting him.

They're saying, if God really loves you, why won't God rescue you?

This point is so low that our protagonist feels they've lost their humanity.

But here's where the song goes next,

into memories of vulnerability that had a pleasant outcome and then a petition.

Yet You, Lord are the One who brought me forth from the womb

You taught me trust when upon my mother's breasts

Upon you I was cast from birth and you have been my God from my mother's womb.

And here's the petition:

Be not far from me for trouble is near and there is none to help.

Such a simple plea, just don't leave me alone.

And the song continues to describe the trouble.

Many bulls have surrounded me strong Bulls of Bashan have encircled me

They open wide their mouth at me as a ravening and a roaring lion

I am poured out like water and all my bones are out of joint

My heart is like Wax it is melted Within Me

My strength is dried up like a potsherd and my tongue Cleaves to my jaws

And you lay me in the dust of death.

Dogs have surrounded me.

A band of evildoers encompasses me

They have pierced my hands and my feet

I can count all my bones.

They look they stare at me.

They divided my garments among them and for my clothing they cast lots.

So, at this point, our protagonist is completely surrounded by enemies

and they have literally pinned him so that he can't escape.

He's exhausted, broken, and humiliated, and they're gambling over his clothes.

What does our forsaken hero do next?

He calls for help.

But You O Lord be not far off

You who are my help, hasten to my assistance

Deliver my soul from The Sword my only life from the power of the dog

Save me from the lion's mouth.

From the horns of the wild oxen, answer me.

Now, we don't hear what the answer is, but something happens, because there's an abrupt turn in the psalm.

The protagonist goes from this pleading, to suddenly and boldly commanding praise.

I will tell of your name to my people

In the midst of the assembly, I will praise you, LORD

You who honor the Lord, Praise Him

Are you descendants of Jacob, glorify him

and stand in awe of him all you descendants of Israel

And our forsaken and afflicted protagonist gives reason for why this praise should happen

For the LORD has not despised nor scorned the suffering of the afflicted;

Nor has the LORD hidden his face from the afflicted one.

But when he cried to the LORD for help,

the LORD heard.

It seems that the pleading for God to be near was answered,

because our hero says that the LORD has heard and has not abandoned him

and because of this, there is a renewed commitment to his vows and

a confidence that God will make things right.

Check it out:

From You, LORD, comes my praise in the great assembly

I shall pay my vows before those who fear You.

The afflicted will eat and be satisfied

Those who seek Him will praise the Lord

May your heart live forever

And then he just goes off, because apparently this isn't just for him,

but the answer from God is apparently enough to declare

that every single person will be restored by this answer.

All the ends of the Earth will remember and turn to the Lord

And all the families of the Nations will worship before You

For the kingdom is the Lord's and he rules over the nations

All the prosperous of the earth will eat and worship

And those who go down to the dust will bow before him

Even he who did not keep his soul alive

Posterity will serve him and it will be told of

The Lord to the coming generation

They will come and will declare his righteousness to a people who will be born

that He has accomplished it.

Wow, lets let that sit a moment, ultimate despair turns into a hope for all humanity

over the course of 31 lines.

I cobbled that together from a couple of different translations, including my own,

just to help it flow, but in case it was still difficult to follow,

It begins with a character called "the afflicted"

Who has been abused and mistreated and surrounded by their enemies

And there's so much pain, and anguish, and fear

that the afflicted feels completely betrayed and abandoned

and he cries out, Why did you leave me alone

This is when I need you most and you're not here.

Then there's the comparison, because

Other people trusted in you and you delivered them

Come one, I've seen you come through for other people

But here I am, so ruined that I'm not even a person anymore

I've been destroyed so thoroughly and everybody hates me

They're mocking me for trusting you

They're saying that if you loved me, I wouldn't be here.

And then there's a memory of complete vulnerability:

I've trusted you from my mother's womb

You have been my God since before I can remember.

But now there's trouble and no one to help

And not only is the afflicted feeling this emotional trauma, but a very physical one as well.

There are these terrible pictures of a man who can see his own bones

Whose mouth is dry and stuck to the roof of his mouth

Enemies and wild beasts have him in their jaws and are stripping him apart.

And in the midst of this, the afflicted continues to cry out for help

And then, it shifts, he gets some sort of answer, and we don't know what it is, but the tone changes.

Instead of hopeless pleading, the afflicted begins to praise.

He says I'm going to tell

Of your name

To my family

I'm going to praise you

And then, and I love this so much, he's not content to praise alone

By the time we get to verse 23 he says you who fear the lord

Praise Him

You descendants of Jacob glorify him stand in awe of him

You descendants of Israel

Something has happened

In the space of two verses

Because

He's been

So afraid and asking for this this salvation and rescue

But then all of a sudden in verse 24 he says

that God has not ignored his affliction and God has not hidden his face from him.

But when he cried to him For help he heard.

So, the answer isn't a rescue, but a restoration.

God is not going to keep the afflicted one from suffering, rather,

because of the suffering, and because God was with him in it,

the afflicted is going to be central to the restoration of humanity.

And then we have all these verses about that restoration, about the prosperous and the poor and even

those abandoned to death all gathering together in the restoration of the world.

It's wild! I really can't think of another work that has more emotional range.

Now the method of this transformation, the "answer" that the afflicted received, is not made clear

And I like to think that that's intentional because the utility of this Psalm at it's most basic level

is how we go from deep depression to Glorious Ascension

And, according to the psalm, we don't do that by glossing over the terror and the blood and the tears of the in-between

We don't have a simple answer we can repeat so you can skip through, but we go through that journey by expressing it

By saying this is where I am and I can't handle it and this is what I need and I don't know if it's there

And we don't stop there, we keep crying out, we get vulnerable and we keep engaging with our poor, broken trust muscles

And if you've been here before, then you feel how exhausting this is,

You feel this when you go through these places in your life where

You realize that you don't have what you need to accomplish what you need done

And so this song even if you're not sure how it works is it essentially crying out for help even when you feel ignored.

It's continuing to cry out for help from a source you don't understand and you're not sure about.

But you know that you can't do this on your own so you crying out for help and you're trusting that

In that cry

In that opening of yourself to what might be out there to save you

That that cry opens the door for hope it opens a door for the possibility of that

Glorious Ascension and that return to gratitude and joy.

If you want to stop there, I hope that helps you and I hope that gives you a reminder that you're not alone, even when

and honestly, especially, if you feel completely lost and abandoned and hopeless.

This psalm acknowledges that those feelings are not just permitted, but encouraged to be expressed and to be engaged with.

This psalm honors the process of working through total abandonment, betrayal, loss, and even death.

It also offers hope that whenever your mysterious "answer" comes, that you too will feel your suffering was worth it

and that you will see your part to play in the remaking of the world.

That’s the point, right there, and that’s the most useful way to engage with this Psalm, in my opinion, but if you want to stick around for some historical context, some deeper meanings, and some insights that help fix some major errors in certain church doctrines, go ahead and check out part 2.